I just had a terrible dream (if I don't wake up on the verge of screaming it isn't a nightmare), and it got me thinking.

Should 'we' as parents, educators, etc be teaching our girls to be comfortable with saying "No" at the same time as protecting them from potentially bad situations? You don't have to tell a girl all the horrible aweful things that can happen to her in order to get her comfortable with saying "No." My boys are very good at it, and they use it frequently. However, I hear it much less from my girls. I have a friend whose husband wrestles with both of their young kids in part to teach their daughter that it is ok to say "Stop" or "No" and that whatever is going on should and will end when she says it. Back in the 60s, a step-relative who was a teenager got her first job and a certain boss was known to come by and grope all the girls standing in a line working, when he touched my relative, she, without thinking (to use her own words), dug her nails into his hand and scratched him rather deeply. She was then so terrified that she ran home, which led to having to explain to her parents what happened. Being a large Catholic Italian family led by a strong Dad, I don't know what happened to the boss, but I'm sure it was not pretty.

In my own experience, there are times where saying "No" would have helped, and times where it could have made things worse. I don't know what is better. At least with being comfortable saying "No" there is a chance that it will work. I suppose making sure the kids are not in situations where they are faced with that kind of choice is the best solution, but they do have to go out eventually. I am not proposing that 6 year olds need to start working on 'saying No curriculum', and I think my 12 year old daughter understands enough to know how to protect herself. I just still have visions in my head of the kind of attitude my sister had where it is "no big deal" and it "doesn't matter" because it was the only way she could cope with what happened to her. It is scary to think about how little we have control over in life. I wouldn't trade it though. Free will is worth the pain and suffering.

I suppose my dream convinced me that volunteering is still a few years off - which was something I was debating about. Though certain supervised groups we are in would be ok.

Obama Education Speech

Oh where, oh where to even begin after the nausea settles (I could hear his voice in my head as I read it, yuck!). The contradictions astound me! First of all the Founding Fathers did NOT sit in classrooms like we have today - being particularly touchy on the issue of forced schooling and dumbing down kids I find it insulting to pretend our flawed education system has been around that long or was that successful at producing intelligent adults with critical thinking skills. But here is the real cincher, it takes hard work, dedication and perseverance to be successful (I didn't want to torture myself or you with the long winded quotes it would have taken to put that down) no matter what your circumstance, but "I'm working hard to fix up your classrooms and get you the books, equipment and computers you need to learn." So, lay out goals and work hard and make sure the government is able to give the schools more money so that kids can have what they need to learn and everyone will be successful.


One more little thing, isn't it interesting that he feels it necessary to let kids know chances are they will not be sucessful "through rapping or basketball or being a reality TV star." How sad that the President thinks we have fallen so far that those are the kind of goals kids look to - being entertainers. Kids don't want to be doctors or lawyers or police officers or teachers (they must be encouraged by the president to pursue those goals), they want to be entertainers. Hmm, either the President is out of touch with the majority of kids in our country who actually want to have careers out of the entertainment industry or he is telling kids they should want to be entertainers or at least pay attention to them because "not everyone can be successful" at such careers. I am rather out of touch with the tv watching majority, so maybe kids are that bad, but by acknowledging entertainment as a valid career option in the same speech in which he is calling for new leaders and inventors is insulting. Maybe I am reading too much into it, but it was just...yuck!


Don't even get me started on him asking God to bless America, although from his point of view I'm sure it was more like Sincerely at the bottom of a letter. Though I don't think that makes things better.


Yeah, there are no hidden messages here, it is just flowers and rainbows and holding hands.